choices, choices, choices

i hate sitting at a restaurant, overwhelmed by the multitude of options on the menu. i’m always the last one to order. (it’s always: should it be the cobb salad with a side of soup, the seafood pasta or the halibut? … oh, but the vegetable lasagna smelled so good!) 

i hate deciding which movie to see. (chick flick or artsy foreign?) i hate deciding when to tell my boss that i need a few days off from work. (today – earlier the better – or tomorrow, when it’s friday & he’s probably in a better mood?) i hate deciding if i should press snooze just one more time in the morning. (get up now & sit down for breakfast or get up in 15 minutes & take it to go?) i hate deciding what to wear when getting dressed for work (sweater vest with a white collared shirt & a skirt or suit pants & a sweater?) basically, i hate decisions. i hate choosing between two perfectly good choices.

i’m really not this indecisive when it comes to the big things in life. i seem to have no trouble making decisions pertaining to career paths, political views & religion. it’s all the silly little stuff everyday that i can’t handle.

i mean deciding whether to have coffe & a banana or hot tea and toast in the morning drives me absolutely insane, but i can confidently say that i want to go to law school & will do whatever it takes to get there.

the way i stress about choosing between grey’s anatomy or yoga on thursdays, you’d think it was life or death. 

is this normal?

i think that we all have our own little quirks & this is mine. might as well embrace my weirdness, i guess. i mean all i can do is laugh the third time i have to tell the waitress that “no, i’m not ready to order yet. can you come back in a couple minutes?”

i’m weird & i’m ok with it. 

 i may not amount to much, but at least i am unique.   jean-jacques rousseau

we must not just patch and tinker with life. we must keep renewing it. embrace novelty and uniqueness.  william james

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