the oscars

while working for a theater, amongst a tingling mass of entertainment-obsessed (read: constantly entertaining) people, i am subjected to entertainment-related chit-chat (read: torture).

the constant babble about celebs and their lives enters into every morning coffee, every meeting, every office space, every lunch break. it permeates the walls of the building. and it should. a theater’s business is to entertain. naturally, they’d be obsessed with other entertainers.

most of my co-workers get their information from tv, from entertainment weekly, from comedy central, from jon stuart, from movies, from people magazine, from online celeb sites, from each other.

i just read the newspaper. the other stuff just doesn’t excited me as much, i guess.

so the oscars roll around (or should i say, the entire staff of arena stage held their breath until sunday night, when their favorite people in the whole world got dressed up in fancy dresses and tuxes and received awards for their big-screen gems.)

of course, everyone insisted that each employee involve themselves in the office oscar pool — pay $1, fill out an oscar predictions sheet, sit on the edge of your seat, with fingers crossed, to see how many you guessed right. the person with the most right answers wins the pool.

i was at a coffee shop, reading, and purposefully avoided the whole oscar hysteria.

i had only seen five (count it: 5!) of the fifty-four movies represented. i could really care less who won.

granted, i’d read about most of the movies in the new york times, the new yorker, the washington post and other news publications, but i’d only seen less than 10% of the movies nominated for awards. i mean, how much could i know about them from reading the NEWSPAPER, right??

wrong.

guess who won the pool – yup, that’s right, nerdy, newspaper-reading me!

ah, what a glorious day it was, when they all applauded, and handed me the envelope, chanting “speech! speech!” (ok, i’m exaggerating a little bit)

they did ask what my secret was…

… did i know an oscar panelist?
… did i know so much because i’m from california? (which, for non-californians, means you live in hollywood and rub shoulders with celebrities every time you step out your door)
… did i really get out to see every movie?

HOW EVER DID I DO IT?

i just smiled and said i read the paper. yes, the newspaper. everyday.

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